Where Art Thou, Mycroft?
by ImNotAPsychopath
Summary: Greg's cousin comes to town and Mycroft doesn't quite know how to feel about it. Written with TheBustyBarmaid.


"Gregory, why do we have a letter from Brixton?" Mycroft inquired as he carried in the daily mail along with a newspaper for him under his armpit and a cup of coffee for his lover in bed. He was wearing nothing under his robin egg blue robe due to the activities of last night and he didn't have to work today thanks to the handy skills of his P.A.

Greg froze and looked at him. "Brixton? Where?"

"The city of Brixton."

"Oh, crap."

Mycroft frowned. "What is it?"

"My cousin…" The look on his face was rather… disturbed.

Mycroft raised an eyebrow. "You have a cousin in Brixton? Why was I not informed?"

"I don't talk to him much…"

"Why not?"

"He's rather…" He stopped unsure of the word he wanted.

"Rather…?" Mycroft raised an eyebrow and handed his lover the cup of coffee.

"I don't know."

"Well then I really can't help you." Mycroft laid down next to him.

"I hope you never have to. Now what does he want?"

Mycroft kissed him softly. "Well… it seems he wants to come visit actually." Greg blanched and Mycroft looked at him patiently.

Greg looked at him seriously. "Can we run away?"

Mycroft gave a soft chuckle. "Sorry, darling. Our lives are here, and you may be able to transfer easily enough, but I assure you that my transfer will be more difficult to acquire. So unless you want to leave me alone, then you can't." Greg groaned and fell back against the couch. Mycroft kissed his forehead soothingly. "Sorry, darling." He looked at him carefully. "So, why don't you want to see him?"

"Uhh.." Greg looked down. "We're not really… compatible." Mycroft raised an eyebrow higher. "Ye-ah." Mycroft looked at him more carefully. He looked uncomfortably at the floor.

"Darling?"

"Yeah, My?"

"Why not?"

Greg shifted uncomfortably. "He's rather… Uncomfortably gay."

"But so are you." Mycroft said bluntly.

"I will be the first to admit that, My. But he's at the other end of the spectrum. You know there's the guys like us who don't act much different than what people consider a heterosexual male. Then there's the guys who act more like girls. Make-up, fashion sense, heels. The girly guys. He's a rather extreme girly guy." Greg fiddled with his hands.

Mycroft blinked. "Oh."

"Yup."

"So . . ."

"So, I don't really want him here because he makes me uncomfortable."

"But it says he's already on his way." Mycroft looked at the letter again and Greg groaned as he buried his face in his hands.

Mycroft looked at him. "Would you like me to get rid of him?"

"No. That's not the best thing to do for a relative, My."

"Well what do you suggest we do?" Mycroft tilted his head.

Greg sighed. "Survive, I guess."

Mycroft chuckled. "Survive it is."

Reggie knocked impatiently on the door. "Gregory! If you would be so kind as to open the door, cousin."

Mycroft opened the door. "You must be Reginald." He gave a polite smile and held out his hand.

"Oh, now, who are you? A friend of dear Gregory's?"

Mycroft's mouth twitched. "You could say that."

"Really now? Usually, when someone says that…" He trailed off, waggling his eyebrows.

Mycroft chuckled. "Yes, well, I'm not a usual person."

"Sooo, are you and Gregory…" He looked at My expectantly. Mycroft raised an eyebrow before he could answer, Greg appeared in the doorway.

"Reginald."

"Oh, Gregory, don't be like that. It's been too long, cousin." Reggie grinned while Mycroft stayed quiet while retreating into the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea and grab two bottles of beer. He had a feeling Gregory would need it.

"Yeah, It's been awhile. Why don't you come in?" Greg held the door open as Reggie sauntered inside. Mycroft silently handed Greg his beer and then Reggie his. He then disappeared into the kitchen again to retrieve his tea.

Greg took a gulp of the beer to get a grip on himself. "So, anything new with you, Reggie?"

"Not much. Job's still rather exciting but I'm running out of ideas. So, I decided to take a break and visit family."

"What do you do?" Mycroft inquired when he came back with his tea.

"I'm a fashion designer. I wouldn't be very good at my trade if I hadn't noticed that lovely suit you are wearing. Armani or Gucci?"

"Armani." Mycroft gave a one-sided smile.

"Knew it!" Reggie winked at Mycroft. Greg shifted uncomfortably.

"Few do." Mycroft chuckled, for once not noticing Gregory's discomfort.

"Oh, but it's so important to understand the competition. True, I mainly stick to women's styles, but one can hardly know too much. I'm sure it's the same for you."

Mycroft smirked. "Actually, I hold a minor position in the British Government. I'm not in fashion."

"Oh, darling. I didn't mean that you were in the fashion world. I just meant your job in general." He laughed a bit.

Mycroft chuckled. "Oh. Apologies."

"Oh, nevermind. Just a tad bit of a misunderstanding." He waved his hand flippantly as he took a drink.

Mycroft nodded before looking to his lover. "Gregory, shall we move this to the living room?"

"Um, sure." He smiled, just a hint of his discomfort visible. "Right this way."

Mycroft smiled. "Thank you." He murmured. Greg gave a curt nod. Mycroft looked at him in concern. "Greg-?"

Greg smiled at him. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, now we have a guest, My."

Reggie looked up from his phone, "Sorry just got an email from a panicked understudy. Did I miss something?" He looked between them.

"Nothing. Just follow me." Greg headed to the living room. Mycroft sighed but dropped it as he followed him. Reggie followed, emailing his understudy and oblivious.

"What are we doing?" Mycroft murmured to Greg.

"Surviving, remember?" Greg grinned cheekily at him. Mycroft chuckled and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Let's get through this. Yeah?"

"Of course, darling." Mycroft murmured.

"C'mon then." Greg sighed and Mycroft followed.

"So, Reggie. Who else have you seen on your trip?"

"Not many. Just some cousins and Aunt Mary. That's about it."

Mycroft looked at Greg. "Mary?

"Yeah. She's more of a platonic aunt than a related one." Greg said and Mycroft hummed.

"Have you seen her recently, cousin? She's getting better but she'll never fully recover."

"No, I should probably do that soon. Just that work gets in the way of personal life."

"Still a copper then, Gregory?"

"Yeah." Greg nodded while Mycroft sipped his tea. "Not much new going on."

"Oh, Gregory. I'm sure your job is very exciting."

Greg laughed. "Yeah, paperwork and annoying colleagues."

"Oh, pish. Mycroft, how about you?"

Mycroft gave an easy smile. "The same, I'm afraid." He gave Gregory a sly wink. Greg smiled into his beer while Mycroft turned to Reggie. "So, what are your plans?"

"Plans for what, exactly? There are so many."

"For your visit."

"Oh, I don't know yet. I haven't been to London in a long time. Maybe some sightseeing."

Mycroft nodded. "I'd be happy to give you a tour."

Greg shrugged. "I'll have to work tomorrow. Sorry." He grinned sheepishly.

"What do you say?" Mycroft looked to Reggie.

"I'd say that sounds positively lovely." He beamed at Mycroft.

Mycroft gave a soft smile. "Good." Greg shifted uncomfortably. Mycroft looked to Greg. "Shall we go out to eat tonight?"

"That sounds like a good idea."

"Oh, you two, that sounds positively lovely!" Reggie clapped his hands together.

Mycroft gave a slight twitch of the mouth. "Good."

Greg stood up. "So where are we going?"

"Why don't you choose?"

"Eh." He shrugged. "Any preferences, Reggie?"

"Ooh, Italian sounds delightful."

Mycroft nodded. "Italian it is."

"I'll get the car then." He got up.

Mycroft nodded. "Thank you, Gregory."

"Yes, thank you so much, dear Gregory."

"Anytime." He left the room.

Mycroft looked at Reggie. "So . . ."

"Yes, Mycroft?" Reggie looked at him seriously.

"Why the sudden visit?"

"I told you, I needed inspiration for my designs." He shrugged.

"Other than that."

"I don't know, I don't need money. If that's what you are getting at."

"Not at all." Mycroft shook his head. "Just wondering why so sudden."

"Eh, not really any reason. Just haven't been out of my studio in a while." A car honked outside. "Sounds like our ride is here."

Mycroft glanced out the window. "So it would seem." He reached for his brolly.

"Yes." Reggie stood up. Mycroft retreated out of the flat, glancing for his love. Greg waved, leaning against the car. Mycroft smiled. Greg opened the door and bowed jokingly. Mycroft rolled his eyes.

Reggie laughed. "Gregory dear, you are a riot."

Greg smirked a little. "I try."

"Too hard at times." Mycroft muttered under his breath. Greg tapped his shoulder and slid into the car after them. Mycroft gave a sly smirk.

"So Mycroft, where are we going?"

"Italian."

"Any place specific?"

"Something five star."

"I don't get much five star on a coppers wage, Mycroft." Greg said with amusement.

"It will be complimentary."

"My, meaning, I don't know where to go!" Greg rolled his eyes. Reggie watched them bicker, amused.

"Ian will drive."

"Alright!" Greg held his hands up in a mock surrender.

Mycroft blinked. "What? Why the surrender?"

"I don't know!" Greg laughed.

Mycroft snorted. "I suppose."

Reggie smiled, "Oh you two are just adorable!"

Mycroft blinked. "Us?"

"Are you certain you're not together? Because you just make the cutest couple!"

"No-"

"Oh, well thats too bad. Absolutely disastrous!" He lamented. Greg drew a quick finger across his throat to stop My from saying anything else.

"But-"

"Well, Gregory never did exhibit the signs, even when we were young."

"Well-"

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Darling. I didn't mean to offend."

"I-"

"Nevermind, I didn't say anything." Greg stifled a giggle at the look on My's face. Reggie turned to Gregory. "Cousin, has there been anyone on your life of late?"

"A few flings here and there. Stopped looking about six months ago." He winked at My. "Not many could handle the price of my job." He shrugged.

"Oh, dear. That's so sad, Gregory."

"I-"

"Never mind that, though. I'm sure there is someone out there for you." Reggie patted Greg's knee.

"But-"

"I'm sure that there is someone out there for you too, Mycroft." The car stopped. "Oh, are we here?"

"We-"

"Oh, don't bother about it. I'm sorry I said anything." Reggie apologized and Greg was trying really hard not to laugh.

"But-"

Reggie got out of the car. Greg turned to My with a smile. "Let it drop. He's not going to listen."

"But-"

"Just let it go."

"But-"

"Yes?"

"We-"

"I know, My. Just leave it be." Greg got out of the car.

"But-"

"So, Reggie. What do you think so far?"

"Positively delightful, cousin. I see why you like it here in the city."

"Greg-"

"Yes, Mycroft?" Greg looked back at him.

"But-"

Reggie popped back up. "Are you two coming?"

"Be right there!"

"I-"

"C'mon, My!"

"But you told me not to say anything!"

"About _us,_ silly. This is just too much fun."

"Why not?!"

"I haven't been able to keep anything from him in years. Besides, his straight little Gregory going out with a very sexy man is not anything he would have been expecting on his little trip."

"But-"

"Boys!" Reggie came over. "What took you so long?"

"We-"

"Oh, never mind. this lovely waiter is getting us a table." Reggie turned away and Greg started snickering. Mycroft gave a big sigh of exasperation at Greg. Greg grinned at him. Mycroft rolled his eyes.

"Boys!"

"Coming, Reggie." Greg followed them to a table.

"Yes, yes." Mycroft sighed and followed. By the time he got there, Reggie was scouring the menu and Greg was looking at him, not the menu. Mycroft sat in between them.

"What are you thinking about getting, Mycroft?"

"Probably some sort of steak."

"At an Italian restaurant this fine?"

"I meet the Italian embassy a lot. All we ever have is Italian."

"Alright then."

"Don't let me make you avoid it. This place is fantastic." Mycroft beamed.

"Hmmm. This shrimp and noodles with spicy alfredo sounds delectable."

"Excellent choice."

"I do enjoy the spicier foods." Reggie smiled and Greg hummed in response.

Mycroft sighed. "I do not, on the other hand. I'm rather partial to sweets, myself." Greg huffed.

"Sweets have their place, in my opinion. There is nothing like the burning and flavorful experience of good spicy food."

Mycroft gave a soft smile. "I'll take your word for it." Reggie hummed thoughtfully, looking over the menu some more. Mycroft began having a silent conversation with Greg.

'_Gregory Lestrade.'_

'_Ye-as?'_

'_You owe me. So. Very. Much.' _Mycroft glared. Greg grinned cheekily at him. _'Lots and lots of sweets and sex. Do I make myself clear?'_

'_Of course.'_ Greg smiled and Mycroft broke eye-contact. Greg huffed and took a drink from his water. Mycroft smirked and did the same.

Reggie looked up. "I'm ready to order. How about you boys?"

"I'm ready." Mycroft nodded.

"Same here."

"Perfect!" Reggie waved the waiter over.

"Mr. Holmes!" The waiter paled. "How long have you been waiting?"

"Not long at all." Mycroft smiled politely. Greg huffed and Reggie looked at Mycroft as if seeing for the first time. "Ah, so, shall we?"

"Go right ahead."

"Reginald?" Mycroft looked to him.

"I'll have the shrimp and noodle with the spicy alfredo."

"Gregory?"

"I'll just have the spaghetti with meatballs."

"Walter, I'll have the usual." Mycroft smiled.

"Yes, sir. Right away." The waiter retreated. Greg giggled a little at the look on Reggie's face. Mycroft smiled.

"Come here often, then?"

"As I said, I have many meetings with the Italian embassy."

"Ah." Reggie nodded. Greg huffed and Mycroft tilted his head at him. Greg winked at him and Mycroft rolled his eyes and huffed himself.

"Where else have you been, Mycroft?"

"Ah, I actually haven't done much traveling." Mycroft lied.

"Really? Where have you been, then?"

"Here." Mycroft chuckled.

Reggie rolled his eyes. "Anywhere other than London? Or England for that matter?"

"Ireland?"

Reggie sighed. "Well that's no fun."

"I didn't claim to be."

"Oh, please." That earned another eye roll.

"What?"

"An obviously rich man like you, only having been to Ireland? A blatant lie if I've ever told one."

"Ah, I'm a busy man. No time for travel." Mycroft swallowed and Reggie rolled his eyes and gave up. Mycroft looked away.

"I'm going to assume that Gregory dear hasn't been anywhere because of work as well." Reggie raised an eyebrow at the man. Greg just grinned and mock toasted.

"I wouldn't know, but judging by his toast, he hasn't."

Reggie facepalmed. "Nowhere, really? Oh my goodness."

"I can't help it."

"Reggie, why don't you tell us about where you've been." Greg grinned. Reggie smiled and began rambling. Mycroft tried to pay attention, but he found that he couldn't. It was too much. Greg noticed Mycroft trying and laughed at him silently only to have Mycroft turn his attention to him. Greg waggled his eyebrows and Mycroft blushed darkly, which didn't go unnoticed by Reggie as he blabbed away.

"So, Reginald, are you-"

"Gay, yes." Reggie grinned.

Mycroft blushed darker. "I didn't mean-"

"Oh, I'm sure you didn't. I just wanted to see your reaction." He grinned.

"I-"

"You're gay as well." Reggie winked.

Mycroft's face was scarlet. "I-" Greg choked and started laughing at the look on My's face.

Reggie grinned. "Yes?"

"I-" Mycroft stuttered and Reggie and Greg started shaking with laughter. Mycroft pouted. Greg grinned and patted him on the back as the waiter brought their food over. Mycroft narrowed his gaze before smiling at the waiter.

"Thank you. This looks delicious." Reggie grinned at the waiter before grabbing his silverware.

"Anything else?"

"No thank you." Mycroft smiled and the waiter ducked his head before leaving.

"I'm great." Reggie looked at his food like a starving man. Greg just shook his head.

Mycroft grinned. "Go ahead." He nodded to Reggie before beginning to eat himself. Reggie dug into his food with the gusto of a man who had not eaten in days. Greg looked at him strangely before working on his own food. Mycroft winced slightly before continuing his delicate ways.

"So, Reggie." Greg spoke up, swallowing. "What do you think?"

"Oh, this food is delicious! Thank you for bringing me here."

"No trouble." Mycroft smiled.

"And my pleasure."

Mycroft smiled. "So, what now?"

"I'd love to know more about you, Mycroft. You've been very vague with me so far." Reggie swirled his pasta with his fork.

"What would you like to know?"

"Where did you grow up?"

"London."

"What neighborhood?"

"Baker Street. My brother lives in the house we lived in actually."

Reggie nodded. "Your brother?"

"Sherlock Holmes. He and his fiancee live in it."

"Fiancee?" Reggie looked at Mycroft with interest.

"John Watson."

"Ooh, A fellow couple, ay?" He waggled his eyebrows.

Mycroft frowned. "Fellow couple?"

"Gay." He said with a smile.

"Yes. They are." Mycroft raised an eyebrow. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Knowing that they are living their lives and not letting the rest of the populace bear down on them. It makes me happy." He shrugged.

Mycroft snorted. "My brother would put them to shame if anyone raised anything against him."

"Good."

Mycroft gave a wry smile. "Not really since I'm the one who has to clean up the mess."

"Really now? The job of a big brother is never done I suppose."

"No." Mycroft smiled. "It really isn't."

Reggie and Greg smiled for different reasons.

Mycroft looked around. "So, what shall we do?"

"Well, I do need to find my hotel."

"Why are you staying in a hotel?" Mycroft frowned. "Stay with me and-"

"Oh, no. I wouldn't want to impose. You have done so much already."

"I don't mind and I'm sure-"

"It's no big deal."

"I would love to have you and-"

"No, I couldn't."

"You should. I really would enjoy your company and-"

Greg shot him a look. "It's alright, Reggie. We understand. We will go get your stuff from the apartment and the driver will take you where you need to go."

Reggie beamed at him. "Thank you, cousin."

Mycroft rolled his eyes when Reggie retreated to the bathroom. "I couldn't even talk about how you would enjoy it. He only seemed to cut me off after I said I would like it."

"He's rather private and doesn't like to . . . impose. As he calls it." Greg shrugged. "He'll be happier at the hotel."

Mycroft frowned. "About what?"

"I dunno. The privacy, maybe."

"Why does he like the privacy?" Mycroft tilted his head. "Surely he knows it's not private."

"Eh, he doesn't like staying over at other's houses. Never has."

"Oh." Mycroft blinked. Greg nodded and turned back to his food.

Reggie waved at them as he got back in the car to go back to the hotel and Mycroft nodded in acknowledgement. As soon as the car was out of sight, Greg sagged against My, exhausted. Mycroft kissed his forehead soothingly. "Bed?"

"Yes."

Mycroft smiled and kissed him sweetly before picking him up. "Let's go." Greg hummed and let My pull him into the bedroom.

Reggie knocked on the door late the next morning. Greg answered. "Hey cousin, do you want to come in?"

"I'll pass. I just came to say good bye. My flight got moved to this afternoon and I'll be heading out soon."

"That's too bad. It was nice seeing you."

"It was good seeing you, too. You should totally give my number to that nice Mycroft. If you're not already dating." Reggie smiled and winked as he walked back to his cab.

Greg laughed in the doorway, waving. "Don't be a stranger!"

Mycroft looked up in surprise when Reggie sat across from him in his favorite local cafe. "Reginald." He set down the papers and took off his glasses.

"Mycroft."

"What are you doing here if you don't mind me asking?" Mycroft tilted his head.

"Waiting for my plane."

"You're leaving already?"

"Yes, my flight got moved."

"That's a shame." Mycroft frowned.

"Oh, that's alright. Lots of people to see."

Mycroft gave a quirked smile. "I know what you mean."

"Well, I do have to run. It was wonderful meeting you!" Reggie got up. Mycroft stood as well and held out his hand only to have Reggie grab it, pull him closer, and smash their lips into a hot kiss. He widened his eyes in surprise before Reggie pulled away. "Thanks for everything!" Reggie flounced out of the room before Mycroft could get his thoughts together.

Mycroft was still standing there when Greg arrived a few hours later, stuck in the same position. "My? You okay?"

A waitress walked up. "He's been like that for a while now…"

"My?" Greg looked at him, alarmed. Mycroft continued staring at nothing. Greg shook him a little. "Mycroft?"

Mycroft jerked under his touch. "I didn't mean anything to it!"

"What? Are you okay?"

"N-nothing, I-I-"

"Shh, let's get you out of here first." Greg pushed him gently out of the door and into his car. Mycroft swallowed and nodded, not trusting his voice.

Greg got him home and onto the couch. "So what happened?" Mycroft opened his mouth but nothing came out. "Did my cousin do something?" Mycroft nodded. Greg's smirk became visible. "What did he do?" Mycroft opened his mouth again but still nothing came out. "My? I'm not going to be mad. I might fall on my ass laughing but I won't be mad."

"Promise?" He whispered hoarsely.

"Promise." Greg smiled.

"He kissed me." Mycroft mumbled.

"He what!?" Greg's smile got really big.

"You heard me." Mycroft's face was bright red. Greg fell on his ass, laughing. Mycroft felt tears of embarrassment prickle his eyes and he went into their bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

"My!" Greg called after him. "I'm not mad!" Silence was met with his words. "Oh, great." Greg got up and walked into the bedroom. Mycroft was curled up on their bed. "My?"

"What?"

"What happened?"

"I told you already."

"But why did you come in here? I'm not mad."

"Because you upset me."

"I promised that I would probably laugh."

"You still upset me."

"I'm sorry."

"It doesn't matter."

"My…"

"Forget it." Mycroft huffed and Greg frowned at him. "Doesn't matter."

"It obviously does.""

"Not to you."

"Yes, it does."

"No, it doesn't."

"Why wouldn't it matter?"

"Because you don't care."

"My, you know that's not true."

"You have an odd way of showing it."

"I do care, My. I just think it's funny."

"Thus showing you don't."

Greg huffed. "My, you're being silly. You know I love you. And I always will. I wondered if Reggie would do something, but I didn't expect it to go that far. I am truly sorry for that. Let's just hope your brother doesn't get wind of what happened, yeah?" He smiled softly at My.

"He will." Mycroft's voice was muffled by the bed.

"Well, be all Government-y and delete it all." Mycroft's voice was muffled by the bed. "Didn't catch that, My." Mycroft rolled his eyes and didn't reply. Greg huffed and Mycroft hummed. "Alright then."

Mycroft twitched. "I feel dirty." He mumbled.

Greg huffed and pulled him off the bed. "Let's go wash then. I owe you." Greg pulled him to the bathroom, a mischievous glint in his eye. Mycroft blinked before eagerly following.


End file.
